We didn’t have any tutor yesterday. I was the one who taught Anika her supposedly Mastery Tests today. I am thankful classes were suspended because we weren’t able to study well at all.
Nagiinarte ng nagiinarte ang Anika eh.
This is one of those times when I doubt myself kung napapalaki ko ba ng tama ang anak ko.
She’s so whiny. Konting kibot reklamo. Pagpinagalitan mo, iirap or sisimangot. Nakaka-inis! Though we make her study everyday, parang hindi ko madukdok yung study habits sa kanya. Puro talaga kasi reklamo. I remember when I was her age, during exam week, I was anxious to study. Gusto kong mag-aral kasi may exams. Pero etong si Anika hindi. Although she’s getting high grades, I am worried baka chamba lang. Kailangan talaga ng bata ang good study habits. Dadalhin niya yun paglaki niya.
I was telling her that she should study to take advantage that she’s attending one of the best schools in the country. Hindi kako lahat ng bata nagkaka-opportunity ng ganito. Yung ibang kids hindi nakakapag-aral at all. In short, I want her to realize na swerte siya.
I don’t know if bata pa kasi or what pero parang hindi nagsisink-in yung mga sinasabi ko eh.
I was telling Alvin, ang lakas kasi ng self-entitlement ni Anika eh. I think for her, everything that she has is normal. Based on my experience and sa mga taong kilala ko, madalang maging successful ang mga taong mataas ang self-entitlement sa katawan.
Natatakot tuloy ako.
Like today, classes were cancelled. I called her three times to tell her to study for her CLE test. Oo daw. When I got home, she didn’t study. I was told she had her friends over.
Nagalit ako mga bakla.
I asked for huge garbage bags. I made her sit down in a corner and watch me put all her toys inside. I told her that she doesn’t deserve all the nice toys and nice things if she doesn’t know how to obey her parents.
Iyak ng iyak. Tinatawag yung mga stuffed toys niya na nasa loob ng garbage bags. I’m so mean daw.
Hinayaan ko nga. Hindi ko lang masyadong winasiwas yung buong room because naaawa ako dun sa yaya niya na magliligpit eventually.
I told her she’s grounded until Monday. No toys, no yaya, no TV and she cannot get anything in her room. I’m just curious anong laro gagawin nito sa weekend.
We studied. Hikbi ng hikbi.
ME: Why are you still crying?
ANIKA: I feel that you don’t like me anymore.
ME: That’s true. I don’t like you very much now.
ANIKA: I feel like you don’t love me anymore.
ME: Hay naku Anika. Gasgas na yan. Hindi na ako naaapektuhan sa ganyang drama. You’re only saying that para hindi na ako magalit. Study. After we study, we will talk again.
True enough habang we were studying parang wala na sa bagets. Tumatawa na parang walang atraso sa akin.
She said sorry while we were taking a bath together a while ago. Sorry daw for fighting with me. Sorry daw for not following me. She can’t handle it daw when I’m mad at her.
I told her okay but she shouldn’t do it again. I told her that I will not take out from the garbage bags her toys until I see that she’s obeying me. Okay daw. Ang pakiusap lang niya is that she can sleep with Candy, her stuffed bear. I agreed because she really can’t sleep without hugging that bear. I told her she’s still grounded. Okay lang daw. It will give her time daw to jump on the bed. Hindi ko gets.
Eto ngayon siya katabi ko, nakasiksik sa akin. Ang lambing.
Napakahirap magpalaki ng anak. I’m thinking naman baka kami din ni Alvin ang may kasalanan why she’s like that. Though for the record ha, mabait si Anika. She is very thoughtful. Hindi pala-away. Maawain sa tao and animals. Our concern nga lang is that since she’s the only child and the only grandchild in my side of the family, she is very doted on by everyone. Tapos bibo pa siya. Talaga naman ang praises eh left and right. Lumalaki ang ulo. Mahirap na.
I came across this article Seven Parenting Behaviors That Stop Children From Being Successful.
I posted it in the Mommy Fleur Blog FB page. Have you read it? Eto daw ang mga yun:
- We do not let our children experience risk.
- We rescue too quickly.
- We rave too easily.
- We let guilt get in the way of leading well.
- We don’t share our past mistakes.
- We mistake intelligence, giftedness and influence for maturity.
- We don’t practice what we preach.
Alvin and I are guilty of some of those behaviors. Lalong lalo na yujng we rescue too quickly. Maawain talaga kasi ako sa lahat, what more pa to my only child?
I will take note of these seven behaviors from now on. I also want to stress that communication between you and your child is also very important. Kailangan you explain to them why you are mad or why you are like that to them pagpinapagalitan niyo. Do not make them guess. Masyado pa silang immature to understand yung point niyo. Explain lang all the time. After everthing, I always assure Anika that even if we fight or even if I get mad at her, hindi nagbabago ang love ko sa kanya.
For me, important na alam ng mga anak natin yan.