A lot of people tell me that I look more like my dad.
Firstborns naman talaga tend to look like their fathers. Do you agree? I look at Alvin and Anika and I see na mukha silang pinagbiyak na bunga.
Case closed.
Anyway, hindi ko masyado nakukwento my dad here. He lives kasi in Amsterdam. He has been living there for, I think, twenty years na.
Back when Philippine Airlines was still operating in Europe, we get to see him many times a year. He would go to Manila every now and then. We would fly to Amsterdam even for just a week to visit him. Libre kasi pamasahe namin. Perks ng employees ng airline yun. Ang saya saya talaga. But since PAL pulled out in Europe, nadalang na din ang uwi ni Papa. From almost monthly, he only goes home here in Manila once or twice a year.
Though I’m sanay na because he has been working abroad most of my life, nakakalungkot din. We do not get to spend as much time together as we like. Corny. When he’s in Manila, the can only stay for two weeks and then he needs to fly back to Amsterdam.
I see my dad kay Alvin. Tama nga siguro sila. You marry someone like your father. Kung ano ang pagka-doting ni Alvin kay Anika, ganun na ganun din Papa ko sa amin. Yung hindi ka talaga magda-doubt na love niya kaming mga anak niya. I can say na umikot mundo ng Papa ko sa aming tatlo magkakapatid.
When I was in Nursery, best in bibbo-ness ako nun. I was the favorite of the teacher so I always get chosen to perform on stage. One of my performances was a declamation piece. I remember that he was the one who taught me the poem that I had to recite on stage in front of everybody. I was 4 years old then but I can still remember the piece very well. The title of the poem was Sing! Sing!
Sing, sing, what shall I sing?
Cat’s run away with the pudding-string!
Do, do, what shall I do?
The cat has bitten it quite in two.
Naaalala ko pa talaga our practices. I would stand up on the top of our stair landing and declaim there. Ginawan niya pa ako nung parang box na may string for my props. Fresh na fresh sa akin ang memory na yun.
There are also times when Papa would take us to adventures. Minsan out of town and minsan din nagha-hiking and picnic kami dun sa may talahib sa gilid ng airport. When I turned 10 years old, he started bringing us with him around the world. Pak na pak. Jetsetter ang peg namin magkakapatid that time. Biyahe dito, biyahe dun. We were always seated in First Class during flights. Libre kasi ang pamasahe.
My dad was a quiet man sa bahay. Hindi siya sermon levels. I remember going to my first ever lakwacha when I was in Grade 6. Hindi ako nagpaalam. Lekat naman kasi. It was the last day of our periodical exams before summer. My friends asked me to go with them to the mall to watch a movie. Pineda and Arnaiz were with me in that gimmik. Uuwi daw kami ng maaga and they will bring me home so I didn’t make paalam anymore. Hindi naman nila sinabi na we will go home early nga PERO ako pala ang last na ihahatid sa bahay. So there. I got home around 9pm na. I was so scared. There weren’t cellphones back then so imagine siguro the stress sa bahay na gabi na, wala pa ako. When I arrived home, I found my dad waiting for me in our living room. Takot na takot ako. But he didn’t shout at me. He just said, “Hindi pwede ito. Bata ka pa para sa mga lakwacha lakwacha.”. Then umalis na. Hindi na ako umulit.
That year.
I’m an unica hija but when it came to boys, except sa isang tao lang talaga, I never had a problem with my dad. Cool siya. Never naman siya humawak ng armalite pagmay umaakyat ng ligaw sa akin. Later on he told me, hindi daw siya kinakabahan kasi sa akin. Maybe it was because of my personality. When I got older, he repeated what he said. Hindi daw siya kinakabahan for me. Meaning, sure siya sa akin when it comes to choosing who to marry. Madami na kasi daw akong practice. Alam ko na daw ano gusto ko. Lol.
My dad was never showy with his feelings too. But you know, I can never forget the day when I broke up with my long time boyfriend. Nakwento ko na ito sa inyo. I was in High School then. Nabalitaan ko ti-nwo time ako ng apat na beses ng boypren ko. I was so sad. I remember being inside the room and he went inside. He told me I look so sad. Boyfriend ba daw? Gusto ko ba daw pumunta ng Hong Kong for the weekend? I was so heartbroken siguro that time kasi I begged off. Sinong nasa tamang pagiisip niya ang humindi sa isang weekend Hong Kong trip?! Di ba?!
My Papa was also a good provider. When I was choosing where to go to college, I asked him san ako pwede mag-apply. Kahit saan daw. “La Salle, pwede?”. “Yes, kahit saan”. So dun ako nag-aral.
He worked hard for us. When I went to Amsterdam to stay with him in 2005 so I can recuperate from my depression, I saw how workaholic my dad was. I would wait for him in his office until late at night. When I mean late, 10:30 na ng gabi, nasa office pa talaga kami. Everyday yan. I felt guilty with all the kickback from my college books money that I got from him. Nakakakunsensya talaga. I also felt guilty for all the times I felt bad because hindi niya ako nabigyan of whatever monetary or material things that I asked from him. Akala ko limpak limpak ang pera niya nun. Hindi naman pala. It was just enough for him to send three kids to one of the most expensive colleges in the country all at the same time.
When my youngest brother graduated college, he retired from that stressful job. Kumuha na lang siya ng job na hindi siya ngarag. Tumatanda na din kasi.
Now, the last time I checked, super happy siya sa current job niya in Amsterdam. He still lives there. Maganda naman kasi talaga dun.
Bakit kamo ako nagtho-throw back? It was my Papa’s birthday last Monday eh! Hehehe! This blog entry has been in my draft folder since that day. Hindi ko matapos tapos because I kept on getting emotional while writing it. I want everyone to know that I have the best dad ever!
Happy happy birthday Papa! Thank you so much for everything! I love you! =) See you real soon!